Being a perfectionist is not bad. In fact perfectionism can be considered a very valuable tool, but when it does not become an obsession.
When we ask ourselves what qualities we are probably represented in the word perfectionism, there are some. We also usually say it with enthusiasm, with impetus, but surely deep down we think, what if it was less of a perfectionist? Would be happier? Would I know how to make mistakes more easily?
We know that accepting mistakes or setbacks is not exactly the easiest of tasks, and the more perfectionist we try to be, the more difficult it is for us to accept them. If we feel that some event or circumstance does not happen as we expected, we probably feel that we do not have everything under control, and right from that moment the fears and insecurities begin.
Surely they have sold us that we are better when we control absolutely everything, but without realizing that our own inner ordeal begins there. We stop remembering when was the last time we made a mistake and we learned about it, but we only take into account how well we have prepared the table, the food or how well we are with that person or in that job.
Do we really know what “perfectionism” means?
We can define it exactly as the constant attitude that a person has, which tends to seek perfection in what he does, improving it indefinitely without deciding to consider it never finished .
Without being too deep, we know that this leads us to achieve a greater number of objectives and a supposed greater personal satisfaction, but do we know when to stop?
Probably not. Being perfectionists in excess makes we live in continuous tension. We probably feel quite great fear and we ask ourselves, what happens if I can’t do it? What if I’m wrong? What will others think of me? We lose the nature of the human being to make mistakes and acquire the teaching that this entails.
Surely we get distressed easily and also we are not even able to celebrate our achievements immediately we are already thinking about the next one. We do not know how to be still without doing anything, it is like a continuous need to have to be doing something but we feel that we are wasting time and we forget that we are losing ourselves.
What is good to know?
It is good to know the difference between continually demanding you do things well or improving things when you can, without anguish or stress, knowing that if we cannot or at that moment we are not capable of it, we are still just as valuable and important. It is good to know that we do not have to detract from ourselves but keep in mind that, at least, we have tried, without taking into account what the result has been.
It is good to know that perfectionism makes us lose and suffer many aspects of our life. Surely you have never asked yourself this series of questions:
- Do I always have the need to be the best or the first in everything?
- Do I have the constant feeling that I always have to be improving how I am, what I am doing or have done?
- Do you feel in a continuous loop of stress and anxiety?
- Do you delay activities in which you don’t feel completely sure of yourself?
If your answers are yes, you are a perfectionist person. This is not bad, the bad thing is to continue on this path without being fully aware of it. And what is even worse, suffering from the fact of not always achieving what we set out to do, or because things do not go the way we want. Probably at some stage in your life you felt that you had low self-esteem and you started to hold on to it.
With what thoughts can we relate perfectionism?
Everything we think about ourselves is reflected in the way we act. Surely we feel the need to feel the approval of certain people, we are afraid of rejection, we tend to have thoughts in a radical way, we do not observe the range of gray or it has to be black or white, we maintain an incorrect perception about ourselves and we tend to classify errors Like failures or I’m useless, I’m worthless
Changing habits…
Today we invite you to observe yourself without judging yourself and listen to yourself without justifying yourself. You don’t have to be perfect in everything you do or how you do it. Life teaches us that it is necessary to make mistakes to know ourselves a little more every day to our own essence.
When you try something and you don’t succeed, don’t beat yourself up, just think I tried. Feel good doing nothing, enjoying a day to yourself without being demanding. You only need the approval of yourself, nobody judges you.
The first step is to accept in order to improve.
